Rendle Legacy, Chapter One

 Rendle Legacy Chapter 1

I have yet to finish a legacy, so I thought I’d try to make it a little more challenging for myself, though without too much frustration.


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Meet Phoebe Rendle. She’s a young adult, just off to college with a measly 500 simoleans. Her face, hair, and clothing were all randomized. (OK, I tweaked the face, but just a little.) So were her aspiration and personality. 6 neat, 5 outgoing, 8 active, 3 playful, 3 nice Scorpio. Should be interesting, I usually play nicer Sims. Her aspiration…


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… well, what do you want out of life, Phoebe?

“Money. That’s what I want.”

Fortune. Argh. Stupid “5”. Keeping a Fortune Sim with no pre-existing friends and no scholarships happy at university, this should be interesting.

She wants to earn $100,000. Better get cracking on that chess table if you want some logic skills to do well in college, then.


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The first dormie, Andrew Mazza. Uh, what’s with the purple smoking jacket + skater hairdo? Never mind, I don’t want to know.

Phoebe gets to pick her mate. I really hope she doesn’t have a thing for this dude. Her turn ons, again made through a random number generator, are beards and underwear, and her turn off is fatness. Kind of weird, but at least she doesn’t like vampires or stench. I was going to roll her gender preference as well, but considering she’s into facial hair, I’m making her straight. I have a feeling she’s going to end up with a professor.

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Dormie #2, Candice Fleg. Apparently on the G.I. Bill.

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#3, Suzie Bruening, looking rather pretty except for a missing hair mesh. Oops. I’m gonna have to cheat and give myself enough money for Merola’s mirror to get Suzie some real hair here.

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“Hi, my name is Phoebe. Will you be my first business contact — I mean friend?”

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They’ve been talking for half an hour, and he likes safes too. Well… he could grow a beard and walk around in his undies as well as anyone, I guess. Phoebe, see what he thinks of you.

“What? He’s just some dormie. I want a rich professor.”

Yeah, do you know how few professors make enough money to qualify as “rich”, Phoebe?

“This is Academie le Tour. Exclusive, expensive — why do you think I only have 500 simoleans left? The tuition is crazy!”

Well, ask anyway, we have to establish your gender preference before you can check people out.

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“He likes stink.”

Oh, OK, well not him then.

“He wears a purple smoking jacket to college, what did you expect?”

All right, let it go. Hey, who’s that guy in the background?

“I TOLD you, I want a professor.”

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“Hey, he’s hot!” And his name is Warren.

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Great, he likes redheads! Woah, Phoebe, you think that’s hot? Look at that shnozz!

“Well, you know what they say…”

Ahem, moving along.

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Well, you’re certainly not shy, bringing up kissing right away. I thought you wanted a professor?

“Shut up, I’m talking about kissing with this hot guy with the honkin’ big nose and coolots.”

Mmkay. Hm, everyone wants a piece of Warren, it seems. Maybe he’s a popularity Sim: pretty good match for a not so nice Fortune Sim who needs lots of “friends” but isn’t great at making them herself.

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And the final dormie, Travis Reeves. Warren’s no Johhny Depp, but I see Phoebe could have had worse taste. Sim women don’t get a lot to choose from.

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What? Phoebe, are you nuts? Huge flat nose, beady little eyes, massive brow ridge: he’s a Neanderthal. Even he looks surprised! Probably because no one has ever found him hot before, so he has no idea why he’s glowing.

“Hey, I like faces with character.”

You like huge noses, is what you like, you dirty-minded little…

“Cyrano de Bergerac had a big nose! It’s not always about the woo-hoo, you know.”

Phoebe, you’re a Sim.

“Cyrano was nobility, and a published author. He was probably loaded!”

Yep, definitely a Sim. Well, go talk to gorilla man. I may end up with an uglacy, with Phoebe’s taste.

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“Sorry, gotta go to class. And when I get back, I certainly hope there’s a painting or sculpture here. This place is a dump.”
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“Oh leemba!”

It’s a sculpture. You wanted one. Now go study. You can kick it later.

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Heh, good thing you never asked him what he thinks of you, Pheebs.

“Huh? I’m kicking the flamingo, what are you talking about?”

Oh, nothing.
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Now, look at Travis Reeves’ face. And he thinks Phoebe is disgusting. Well, her lightning bolts belong to Warren anyway. All two of them.
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Not that Warren Wood (yes, Wood) is actually any better. Eesh.

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Phoebe actually wanted to do her homework. Keep wanting things like that, and we might get you a money tree soon.

“I know.”

Fortune Sims are so disconcertingly goal-oriented.
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Now she wants to write her term paper. “Beards Correlated to Wealth Throughout SimCity History” That’s my good little Fortune Sim.

“You get to buy me a Mustang later.”

Um, sure, whatever, keep writing.
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Well, first night in the dorm, and we already have a see-through dormie.

“So, Candice, about those military experiments you were involved in before college –“

“We have a strict don’t ask, don’t tell policy.”
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I wish writing term papers paid off like this in real life.
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I knew when I saw that nose that Phoebe would be into Thomas Ebadi. This is one weird chick. So, what does he think of her?
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Well, he likes her. Two lightningbolts for Thomas too. He’s slightly less hideous than Warren… still. I wish Phoebe would find someone a little more to her taste.

“Huh? I like both these guys.”

And when I say her taste, I mean mine.
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Aw, poor Warren, he looks kinda sad that Phoebe is sitting on the couch with another big-nose. Well, he’s still in the running, and he has the advantage of living with Phoebe. I think he’s got a bigger nose than Thomas, too.
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Then again, he also has a thing for Suzie Bruenig.
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Yay, Candice is visible again!

“You never saw me invisible.”

Yeah, because you were like, invisible.

“No, you never SAW me invisible. Do you really want to be visited by a black helicopter?”

Oookay, never saw a thing.
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Warren doesn’t look too excited about it, but he’ll talk with Phoebe about her favorite subject.

“Hey, whatever gets me into a Legacy family. I want to pass my rockin’ nose genes on.”

Well, keep at it, Warren, you’ve got competition, and the fact that you’re as broke as Phoebe isn’t helping you any.
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Three “gossips” in a row about poor Candice. Hey, lay off of Candice, I like her.

“So?”

She also has a black helicopter secret service government connection of some kind.

“So?”

Phoebe has one logic point.
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Ah, the time-honored tradition of dormies falling asleep in macaroni and cheese.
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3500 aspiration for being friends, I’m definitely thinking popularity, though he’s nice enough that he might want to be friends with her anyway.

Phoebe would rather have a painting than a friend.

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There, happy now?

“Now I must earn money to pay for it.”

You know, I’ve had Fortune Sims before, Phoebe, but you are the most antisocial. I have never had any kind of Sim who NEVER rolled wants having to do with people before. You don’t even care about dating guys you have two lightning bolts with, what’s up with that?

“Dates cost money, And I bet all those other Fortune Sims were nice or something.”

Well, yes, they were.

“Pfft, cupcakes. I only care about the important things in life: doing my assignments, making money from my money tree, and buying stuff. And, of course, marrying a rich Sim.”

Yes, I know, Phoebe, you’ve had that stupid want stuck on your panel since day 1. Fine, tonight we go downtown and see if we can find anyone appropriate for your cold little money-grubbing heart.

“Yay!”
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Phoebe actually rolled up a want to do this. Hey, Phoebe, are you growing a heart? Did what I say get through to you?

“No. Look at that nose! Who can help but admire it?”
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Yep, Phoebe’s an economics major. She wants to do her homework, but first, I want to see if I can do better than 2 lightningbolts for her.

“You mean there might be men with bigger noses out there?”

Bigger bank accounts.

“Rockin’.”

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Two of your roommates are passed out right in front of you, Warren.

“So?”

I really hate dormies.

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And there he goes too. You guys have beds, you know.

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As soon as she got out of the cab at Midnight Flows, Phoebe picked a fight with the fireman.
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Apparently, that really got her blood up. She thinks he’s hot.

Hey, he’s not bad! He could possibly make us pretty children! He does have a big nose, but it looks kind of balanced with the rest of his face.

Unfortunately, he took off before Phoebe could try to have a civil conversation with him. Well, she can call him.
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Phoebe wanted to sing karaoke, and she absolutely stinks, of course, but WHAT IS WRONG WITH THAT OLD LADY’S ARM?

Ew, just ew. That is nasty.
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Here is Beverly, singing be-euwtifully. A Townie who married into another one of my families. She’s just here because I like her — Romance Sim or not, she’s been an awesome wife and mother.
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Think you will be, Phoebe?

“Sorry, I was thinking of something else. How much do firefighters get paid?”

Phoebe, you are not marrying a rich Sim.

“Well, one of those vampires was here…”

No.
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“Why Public Service Workers Should Be Paid More”

Nah, it’s not a social conscience. She wants her firefighter to be a rich Sim to marry.
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Have I mentioned how much I hate dormies? Would it be too much to ask that they be potty trained, know where their beds are, and know how to eat?
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I’m going to try an experiment. Maybe if none of the beds are behind Myne doors, dormies will be able to find them.
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“Hi, Mr. Fireman. I think you’re pretty cool — of course, you’re the only person I know who I haven’t seen passed out in a bowl of macaroni and cheese. Want to come over some time?”

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Uh-oh. He’s bored by money. This doesn’t bode well.
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Nope. He doesn’t like redheads.
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Aaw, poor Phoebe. Well, wouldn’t you be sad? Instead of the hunky fireman, you get…
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This.

That isn’t even his own room he’s stinking up, it’s Suzie’s.
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You made the Dean’s List. Couldn’t you look a LITTLE excited?

“Yeah, whatever, I want to do my homework.”

Egads, she’s boring.
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For a Sim I don’t control, Warren sure looks at me a whole lot. Maybe he knows what’s in store for him — if he ever gets rid of that homework bar stuck above his head.
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Suzie’s been wandering around in her underwear for two days now, when she isn’t standing around in her underwear. That’s not really the kind of undies you show off, Suzie.
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I thought the cow mascot had basically moved in with us, but then I realized it was two different cow mascots. This one is Sarah. She or the other one, Chris, are in this dorm at all times. I’ve seen the coach in passing once, but other than that, no University NPCs but the cow. Not that I’m complaining.

“I want to meet a professor.”

What? No, you want to do your assignment, write your term paper, have a party, and buy another picture.

“I’m talking of long term wants here. I want a rich guy with a beard, and that means professor.”

And here I was thinking Sims didn’t do long term planning. Phoebe, I think you’re gonna have to resign yourself to Warren.

“But –“

Well, we have three and a half more years to go.

“What? Are you nuts? Three and a half years more with stinky dormies and this cow?”

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You have a point. Okay, go make more friends. Like, more than two. Maybe we’ll get you to found a Greek House.

“Hi Suzie, nice granny undies. What do you think of living in a dorm? Aren’t you sick of it?”

“Well, I wouldn’t exist without it.”

“Good point.”

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Asleep in a bed, not in mac and cheese! Beds outside for dormies has definitely made my life much less annoying.
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You didn’t really think you could make Phoebe cry, did you cow?
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“You know, Andrew, I really like Warren.”

“Yeah, Warren is totally hot. Who can resist that nose?”

“You stay away from him, purple-coated skater dude.”
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I’ve always thought Remington was ugly. But THIS guy — Leo Gast. He is definitely marrying one of my Sims.
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Well, she did this on her own. You know, Phoebe, not only is Warren poor, he’s glitched.

“Hey, I’m young, I’m in college, I don’t have to dedicate my life to someone because of one backrub.”

Sometimes I think she forgets she’s a Sim.
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All right, Phoebe, you want to be a young college student, let’s see what’s out in the field. This guy is into you, and he looks rich.

“Well, he’s hot, but I dunno, what’s with the red coat? He’s like who that guy in my dorm wants to be when he grows up.”

All right, moving on.
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He really likes you, AND he has facial hair.

“He’s very nice.”

“Very nice”? That’s it?

“Well, I’m picky.”
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Uh-huh, sure you are.

Completely autonomous squeeze in the dorm dining room. Phoebe, you’ve made your choice, haven’t you? They first guy that glowed for you, aaw, how sweet.

“Is not! He’s a popularity Sim, I just know it, he’ll be great staying at home schmoozing while I’m raking in the dough.”

How romantic.

“And our kids will all be redheads.”

With big noses.

“This is a problem?”

Well, I’m going to have to go through some hoops to make sure Warren, as a dormie, doesn’t glitch, Phoebe, I hope you appreciate that.

“Yeah, whatever, mind turning the camera off now?”
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Phoebe, privacy isn’t something you can ever have. Wow, one hug is all it took for true love to blossom.

He’s shorter than her, uglier than her, and nicer than her. I just hope he doesn’t have a “have a bajillion best friends” lifetime want.
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Either Warren’s thinking of Phoebe, or he really loves his Cap’n Crunch.
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You know how in Sim stories, the writers are always pretending punch you-punch me is a real fight? Phoebe wishes I’d let her fight, but this is the closest she gets.

Phoebe, it took forever to make Suzie your friend, and you always liked her about twice as much as she liked you. Are you telling me you’re gonna mess it up now?

“Look who’s talking about messing things up, Suzie’s picture on her door still shows that nonexistent hair mesh.”
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Suzie won’t stop looking at me.

Suzie, I can’t help you, you’re a dormie. I think I already saved your life by putting those beds on the lawn. You’re pretty cute, though, maybe you can marry into the second generation.

“Great, mean, big nose kids, just what I always wanted.”
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Okay, I know you’ve never wanted a date, but you’re boring me. Go to it.
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They had a dream date, but nothing really interesting happened. This always seems to be the pose after a date.
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After multiple makeout sessions and a dream date with Warren, Phoebe is of course dreaming of the guy who’s disgusted by her.
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Okay, Phoebe, now that you’ve got a couple friends and a little money, how about founding that Greek House?

“Huh? I just woke up, you want me to do what?”

Go found a Greek House. There will be more room to put the stuff you want to buy.

“Sounds cool, how do I do it?”

Uh… I dunno, I’ve never done it. I was hoping you’d know.

“Hello, I’m a Sim. I’m the equivalent of 21 years old and I still don’t know how to cook mac and cheese.”

Oh right. Well, nothing to do but try and see what happens.

“I’m doomed, aren’t I?”

Hey, just wait till you graduate.
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“This Greek House seems to be missing, like, a HOUSE.”

You’ve got over $4500, Phoebe, don’t worry about it. We’re about to go on a spending spree.

“Can I have a stereo that costs $1800?”

Uh, no.
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So here it is, your very own Greek House. Aren’t you proud, Phoebe?

“It is NOT a “house”.”

Good thing Sims don’t have weather. [Well, they didn’t when I wrote this.]
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Phoebe visited campus to get this letter. Whatever it is.
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All Phoebe’s former dormies joined her house. Three of them, plus Thomas, moved in. This is the best thing that happened during the pledging process: the Chris cow kicked the butt of the guy who thinks Phoebe is disgusting. Phoebe called her the next day and made friends. Make nausea faces at my Sims, will you…
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With the money from everyone making the Dean’s list at the end of the semester, they were able to buy more walls and an actual roof.
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The interior’s nothing to write home about, though.
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Now that Warren’s a member of the Greek house, I had him change his hair. Looking much better. I also gave him sideburns, they should count as facial hair for Phoebe to go gaga over.
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She was suitably impressed.
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“Well, it’s about time. I’ve wanted to do this since at least sophomore year.”

We couldn’t afford a double bed, sorry Phoebe.

“That’s what changing booths and hot tubs are for.”

Hey, you’re not a Romance Sim!

“I’m the Simquivalent of 22, and this guy’s been my boyfriend for two years!”

OK, my bad.
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Warren keeps getting up in the middle of the night to go get pizza. A man after my own heart.
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One last shot of the Greek House as it is in Phoebe’s time. She sure does grab Warren a lot.

“Got a problem with that?”

Nope, but the neighbors might.
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Ah, the graduation party. The guy in the cap and gown is actually a llama mascot. I think this is the first time I’ve seen a real smustle, and not just a bunch of Sims flailing about aimlessly.
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Warren, you really could have chosen a better place to transition. And better clothes.
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This was rather amusing, if slightly creepy. Everyone mobbed Warren in the bathroom, and he got stuck. I had to use move_objects to move everyone. I guess they just didn’t want to let him go.
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Thomas, you came really close to being Phoebe’s husband. You’re a lot sweeter than Warren, but in the end, sweetness wasn’t enough. Warren glowed more.
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Yeah, I like you and all, but are you expecting a flood? (Back to the Future rimshot.)
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Look how happy Candice is to get out of this dump.

“I always look happy!”

I know, and it’s weird because you only have three nice points. Best outfit choice so far though.
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Phoebe, WHAT ARE YOU WEARING.

“What? It’s cute.”

You choose a little pink slip to join the adult world in. Brilliant. Goes really nicely with that red hair. I think you need new glasses.

“Whatever. Bye Suzie, it’s been fun, I’ll call you sometime when I’m a rich athlete.”
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Yep, Suzie drew the short straw to hold the lot. She wants to be big on campus, though, so I doubt she minds.

“Hey, it’s better than being an often-invisible dormie passed out in a puddle of pee.”

We’ll be seeing you again Suzie… you may even get to marry one of Phoebe’s descendents.

“How does that work, anyway, I’m the same age as her.”
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“Oh go away, I’m too tired from smustling. I’m taking Phoebe’s bed, by the way.”

Er, OK then. Next time: better clothes, marriage, money, and babies. And no Suzie.

“I’m a Bruening, I do know how to use the phone.”

On that ominous note… ttfn.

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2 Responses to Rendle Legacy, Chapter One

  1. I like your rather barbed sense of humor when it comes to these writeups 🙂

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